(Not) Back to School

School starts today at my old building.

If you're unfamiliar with my current circumstances, I'm taking a year or two (or five) off from full-time teaching because we're going to be moving more than once in these next few years due to the army, and I have a baby to take care of and childcare would cost most of a teacher's salary in this part of the country.

Last minute mad dash to get everything done.
The month of August is threat-level midnight for teachers. My piles and to-do lists were always unreal. I LOVED it, but it's incredibly stressful.

Surprise hundreds of dollars I "need" to spend.
There's always ten last-minute somethings you need to buy or pick-up or "try" for the new school year.

Teacher icebreakers and meeting new staff.
While I always thoroughly enjoyed that first day back, going through the motivational videos, the powerpoints, the introductions to the new staff (turnover in Colorado is unreal) was exhausting. All I ever wanted to do was keep checking the gradebook online to see how many more kids were being added to my list and get back to my classroom to continue on with my to-do lists.
Oh, and the icebreakers. There was always some lame way to get teachers to "know each other" and share about our "summers". My summers in Colorado, I've mentioned before, usually just included painting and mowing the field, so this was always my least favorite question to answer.

Trying to figure out new kids and parents.
It's so exciting to meet new kids. I really enjoy it. I always make it a point to shake their hand and talk to them, not just their parents, at meet-the-teacher night. However, you never know what you're getting into when you see 30 new faces looking at you on day one. Or when you see their names on the class list and desperately try to figure them out based on their school picture from the previous year. Exciting, yes. Somewhat terrifying about the awe of responsibility you're about to undertake? Also yes.
And parents. Well, you can tell who will be hard to deal with based on their reaction to unpacking the school supplies on meet-the-teacher night. You can also tell who will be absolutely delightful and it gives you faith in the work you're doing.

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In the end, I would go back in a heartbeat and I hope to after a few years. I taught for 10 solid years; 2 of them subbing, both day-to-day and long-term positions, and then 8 years in a row in my own classroom, in 3 different states.
But, by saying I would go back, I mean I would go back to teaching as soon as it worked for our family, in a different state, under different circumstances. I would not go back to my previous position, in my previous location. I'll miss a lot of the people that I worked with, but I won't miss teaching in Colorado because it made me dislike teaching so much of the time. I have no problem explaining and defending this position to anyone who would ask me about it: I have the experience in other places to back up my opinion that Colorado schools just aren't that great. In the end, I've realized that I am definitely in a bit of mourning for my current lack of a professional position, but I'm not in mourning for the position I gave up.

I won't list all the things I'll miss about teaching because the list is long, but a lot of what I'll miss are parts of school that I experienced in other places. Someday I'll get back to those, but this year off may be just the shift and reset that I need. Plus, going back late, after a maternity leave, even under the most ideal circumstances, would be a traumatic event for all involved I'm sure.

Scott put a pig next to him (a dog toy) because he's been putting away a shocking amount of milk lately. 

What worked and what didn't.

With a new school year, comes new routines and changes. This isn't work related, but is a round-up of what's been working for me over the last two weeks.

1. I attempted to really get back into a solid routine last week. I didn't drink nearly as much caffeine, so that was good. I still ate a lot of candy so that was a pitfall but it's candy corn season and so there's not much I can do about that.

2. I have some sort of sinus infection that has settled in my ears. I'm taking a cocktail of whatever medicine I can find around the house and I will likely call to see if I can get an appointment this week. Trying to pop my ears isn't working, I've bought more Sudafed than Jesse Pinkman, and sleeping is becoming a challenge.

3. In terms of breakfast...I actually attempted to drink protein powder/milk again this week...thinking that if I left out of the peanut butter and the banana I'd be able to stomach it. Barely. I came to the conclusion that I would rather starve than have a chocolate protein drink. Like, being hungry and weak is preferable.
I'm thinking that I would be able to do vanilla with fruit/spinach at some point, but we have a ton of chocolate powder and I don't feel like spending $60 on vanilla. I found that I can eat a Clif bar in the morning and be okay until about lunch time (or at least snacktime at 10:30). This has, clearly, been a very traumatic process. Regular Clif bars don't have a ton of protein (9-11 grams) but they make protein bars that have 14 or 15 grams and those ones taste pretty good.

4. Before these last two weeks, I'd been going to classes at the gym...toning, lifting, cardio, kickboxing...and I really do want to incorporate those things back into my life. However, I also knew that I had to keep doing what I know works for me and shows results, especially during busy seasons. I kept at 20-30 minutes of Pilates a day for the last week and that felt good. I've been trying to do some yoga every Sunday too.

5. I had to stop the Wal-Mart grocery pre-ordering. The reason is actually really simple: I hate the produce at Wal-Mart. I feel like it's so inferior to what I can get elsewhere. Maybe this is just a Colorado thing? The commissary, and even Safeway, has produce that tastes and looks good and lasts too. Plus, I love buying salad mixes and the Great Value brand is awful. I'm saving on the actual trip through the store, but I'm ending up with things I don't want to eat, so what's the point? Wal-Mart isn't really cheaper...just not having to block out two hours to grocery shop was nice.

6. I almost threw away my Erin Condren planner. I even bought a new little $7 one from Target because I was all FRESH START!!! and then I realized I actually kind of liked my EC planner and, even though fresh starts in January aren't really my thing, I'm going to keep getting EC planners in January because I really do love them. There's a reason I came back to the brand after trying a few others over the last few years. They are SO sturdy and that paper quality can't be matched by anything else I've tried.

7. I've been trying the charcoal bar from Beauty Counter and then using my clarifying toner and dual intensive treatment over top of it. I LOVE the charcoal bar. I don't have dry skin on my face (only on my hands) and it leaves my face squeaky clean and ready for toner. It's completely worth every penny.

That's kind of the overview of what I've been trying lately and how it's been working. It's been a super weird summer in many ways and this next year will look different than the last few for us but we've got some changes on the horizon and that, I think, is a good thing.

(I can provide links for anything above that you may be interested in.)

August Goal: Enjoy the process

This is my favorite time of year.  Back-to-school season.  This is when my years begin.  I have a lot of trouble with New Year's resolutions and goals because I don't see it as the beginning of things; it's the middle.

Which is why I gave up Emily Ley planner last week and bought a cute, convenient, portable one from Target for $8.

I preferred my previous Erin Condren planners when it came to functionality (compared to the Simplified Planner) but those things were way too bulky.  I'm trying to legitimately simplify and make things easier on myself these days (not just buy a planner with "simple" in the title and think that automatically makes my life easier).  Concerning planners, I was happiest in college and just out of college when I had truly simple planners, so back to basics.

Anyway, I learned a few things about myself this summer.

1. I like new stuff.  Each August, I want a fresh start.  This year I got a new bag (instead of a new purse because I don't really have my eye on a purse at the moment anyway), a new water bottle (because you all were right and that Camelbak one leaks), and a new planner.  Also, new pens, new lipstick, new nail polish.  And $$$ worth of stuff from the Gap that Scott hasn't mentioned seeing yet, so I'm just thinking he might not notice.

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2.  I need a job.  I can't stay home.  I tried this once before and it didn't work.  I've been bored and directionless for a chunk of the summer, to be honest.  It's nice to have a place to go every day, even if I do have to drive 30 minutes to get there and pack a lunch and leave the house at 7am (doesn't that seem, like, really early?). I've tossed around the idea of not working or doing something else so many times because staying current in this field is hard when you move from state to state (spoiler alert: Colorado might be it for us).  Truthfully, I don't need a summer vacation.  I need a couple of months to regroup and realize just how much I do like going to work each day.

So my goal this month is to just enjoy it.

from the book 10% Happier... by Dan Harris

Stuff and Things 6/25

+Here is an article that Jana posted last week and I think all of us would agree with just about all of it.
27 Normal Things kids can't do in school anymore.  Some of the things are still allowed.  We still play dodgeball.  We just use soft foam balls that won't leave welts.  They're kind of hard to throw.  However, I think it needs to be mentioned that the reason why these things aren't allowed in school anymore is because parents have insisted, over the last 20 years, that these things not be allowed in school.  Some parent got upset because their kid got hit with a dodgeball (while playing dodgeball) and so now we use soft foam balls that can hardly be thrown because they weigh less than air.

+26 Signs You're a Teacher on Summer Break. I haven't been able to remember what day it is lately.  During the school year, I usually get up at 5am and lately I've been letting the dogs out around 6:30am and then getting up around 7-7:30am.  Usually with a headache and general feeling of being exhausted.  I go to bed any time between 9pm and midnight, depending. I am definitely out of a routine.
But I am already unpacking my new classroom and brainstorming ideas.  My goal is to have the heavy-lifting/time-consuming work done by mid-July.

+I think I love my dogs more and more every day.  Tell me I'm not the first one to come up with "Paw-ther's Day".

+Speaking of Scott, I complained to him about how I need a desk because I know the second he gets back from his deployment/TDY thing, he will turn things into a construction zone again and my argument was that I need my own space.  Meaning, the kitchen table doesn't cut it anymore and I used to have a desk that I bought in college and we got rid of it when we moved here last year because it was only a $70 fake wood thing from Target and we never used it in Alaska but he used it in Missouri, but this house had a built-in desk in the bedroom in the basement, so now he uses that as his desk for his computer and whatnot and I STILL DON'T HAVE A DESK.

I ran all over town on Sunday looking for something cheap (yet sturdy and cute) at Homegoods, Target, and even Wal-Mart (because we have a Better Homes and Gardens bench from there that we love and I thought that brand might have a desk).  And then I realized that I don't have the functional capacity to to put a desk together because, hey, I'm no engineer and I could barely put together the filing racks for the filing cabinet in my classroom this week.  And I considered, for a brief second, a trip to Ikea in Denver and then I laughed about that for awhile and then I bit the bullet and looked at World Market's website and sent a link to Scott to show him what I was looking for...and then he bought me the desk.  Thank goodness I didn't have to make that decision on my own.  What do you think the chances are that it'll just arrive like this, already put together?

He also bought himself a wine rack.

4:30am wake-up call

It was windy and my feet are being weird.  Sorry.

Dress: Gap // Shoes: Famous Footwear

Last week I got up at 4:38am everyday.  You see, since our friends were using Scott's truck to see Colorado Springs, I had to drop Scott off at PT everyday before I went to school.  Monday through Wednesday was just training for me and Thursday and Friday started the school year.

My alarm went off.  I fed the dogs, took them out, got myself reasonably ready and packed all my bags.   I generously let Scott sleep until 5:00 each day because I can't get ready with someone else in the way.  I'm pretty selfish in the wee hours.

The goal was: out of the house by 5:30am, hopefully didn't hit traffic, on base by 6:05, drop Scott off, at the gym by 6:20.  Work out for about 30-40 minutes, shower/change/hair, make-up if time (if not, that's what the parking lot is for).  Sometimes I'd stop for green tea on my way to school.  I wasn't craving coffee for some reason.

Anyway, this is my point:  I felt more "together" last week than I do this week (and it's only Monday night as I'm typing this).  Not having the time to twiddle away in the morning actually kind of agrees with me.  Today (again, Monday) I felt terribly disorganized all day and it's because I didn't force myself to pack three bags and just get things done.

I think that today (Tuesday) I'm going to revert to last week's schedule.  Is that completely crazy?

5 years. 4 classrooms. 3 states.

This month, I've embarked on setting up my 4th classroom.  It's my 3rd state in the last 5 years.  As an aspiring teacher, I never dreamed I'd only get to teach for a few years at a time, but that's military life for you. And, as a new army wife, back in 2009, I never dreamed I'd get to take my career this far.  To be honest, when we moved to Alaska, I worked on getting a job, but I never imagined that I'd really be able to keep teaching.  I'm lucky, very lucky and I know it.

I'm starting my 5th year of teaching and I consider it to be nothing short of miraculous.  5 consecutive years.  For most teachers, that's not a big deal.  However, this is my 4th classroom and my 3rd state.  And I've challenged Scott to find another army wife who has taught for 5 consecutive years whilst PCSing her way across the country (He doesn't know how lucky he is, right?  I've paid for half our hunting gear, I'm sure.)

I graduated from Penn State in May 2008.  I couldn't find a job.  I searched high and low.  I went on interviews.  I saved my rejection letters for posterity.  In August 2008, I met Scott.  I subbed in the local elementary school to make money.  Scott and I got engaged in February 2009 and married in May.  We moved to Alaska in September.  Before we moved, I'd had a phone interview with the Anchorage School District.  To say it was "awful" doesn't even begin to cover it.  Needless to say, they blacklisted me.  Still, that first year in Alaska, I subbed in Anchorage to get my foot back in the door (a fruitless effort).  That spring, I tried a different district north of Anchorage.  They hired me.  I worked there for 3 years and most of it was absolutely blissful.  Beautiful school, great kids…I wish I'd been able to take it with me.  But, the army called.

Last year, I was lucky enough to fall into a teaching position in Missouri at the 11th hour.  School started in August.  I started September 9th.  Honestly, I never had a chance, but I did what I could.  It was probably the best learning experience of my life.  I felt like someone had opened up my brain and poured in knowledge.  Standards, objectives, data, teaching techniques, interactive notebooks, new Smartboard tricks, Cornell Notes, Class Dojo…and so much more I didn't have the chance to get to because it was time to move again.  However, I learned how business was done efficiently in a big school and my principals and co-workers were quite the role models.

In May, I accepted a position in Colorado Springs and as I was hanging up the phone that evening, Scott said, "HOW do you DO this?" Like I said, he doesn't know how lucky he is.

However, he wasn't there when I had rejection after rejection in the summer of 2008.  He was there when Anchorage sent me rejection after rejection during the 2009-2010 school year.  He was there when my position was in danger of being cut after the 2010-2011 school year.  He was there when I couldn't find anything in Missouri last summer.

The point is:  I worked really hard to get here.  It has nothing to do with how hard teachers work.  It has to do with the effort that goes into finding a new job.  With the classes I've had to take to keep up certifications and the hundreds of hours of professional development and the hundreds of relationships I've been able to achieve.  In so many ways, the Army has actually HELPED my career.  How many army wives can say that?

*This is not a "should I work/should I not work" argument.  Lots of military wives don't work by choice, but lots maintain careers too.  It's a personal choice.*

So, anyway…

As I sat through my week-long orientation, I definitely felt overwhelmed and I certainly felt like, "Eh, I can do this.  I've done it before, right?"  Kids are kids everywhere and so I was excited just to dive in.

The biggest difference is that I was always part of a 5 or 6 teacher grade-level team in Alaska.  In Missouri, I was on a 15 teacher grade-level team (or maybe it was 14…when the numbers get too big, it becomes hard to keep track).  Here, it's just me and one other teacher and we're both new to the district, so it will make for an interesting year and a lot more effort.  I'm used to the veteran staff telling me what to do.

This post should also probably serve as a disclaimer of sorts.  If I'm a bit AWOL, the new school year at a new school would be the reason why.

If you want to take a look back…
My first Alaska classroom
My second Alaska classroom (I traded up)
My Missouri classroom