Girl math.

This is a favorite of mine: the girl math trend. 

Some examples: if someone else buys it for you, it's free.

If you use cash, it's free. 

It's if pre-loaded on an app (like Starbucks), also free. 

Get it?

My favorite one is that if it's a gift card, it's legitimately free. Also, I must spend it as quickly as possible. I just held onto a Visa gift card for over a month, which is a record for me. My friend is always joking about sending me Target packages (she's the one I talked about here) and do not think that I won't spend a Target gift card same-day, if I'm given one. I mean, the money's already been spent. I think their clothes are super ugly these days so I'd probably use it to buy diapers or something boring. 

I spent my $100 Visa gift card on Saturday at Walmart and the total was $180, which means I only spent $80 at Walmart this week, which means the economy is doing better. It's Bidenomics at work! 

Jk. I bought a Keurig, skewing the grocery bill for the week, which I was not supposed to do because Scott swore he'd never buy another Keurig but our Mueller broke two years ago and I bought this Keurig with a Gift. Card. Which means it was FREE, which means it doesn't even count that I bought it in the first place! (Again, this sounds like something Bidenomics would promote.)

If it's from Amazon, it goes to my husband's credit card so it's also free. My husband buys so much from Amazon (usually tools and parts to fix things) that when I sneak in a romper or a random paperback, it's practically free because it's so small and insignificant by comparison. If I do an Amazon return and take credit to the account instead of money back, that's also free money.

If I get a discount on something, it's almost free. If it's something I was going to buy eventually anyway, might as well buy the couponed version.

If I buy myself a present for an anniversary or birthday or Christmas, it doesn't count. Might as well be free. 

If Scott takes out cash at the ATM and asks if I need any, that's free money. We went through a period of having a lot of cash on hand (covid times and when we were paying a sitter/daycare in cash) and that was f-r-e-e money for my then-Target runs for sure. If it doesn't show up on a bill, it's a sunk (free) cost, right?