Self-Compassion

Edited to add: I wrote this before the Women Tell All episode of The Bachelor last week. You know, the showdown in which Corrine was given a free pass to act like a spoiled brat and was actually celebrated for it because that's what our country seems to value. Sickening, right?

Subtitle: Personal development learned from The Bachelor.

I was listening to the Here to Make Friends bonus episode on Friday afternoon a few weeks ago. Actually, Friday night. I'd put in a full day at work and then I'd had a thing to go to after work and this led to me getting home at 6:30pm, which is out of my normal routine. The dogs weren't pleased.

The hosts were interviewing Taylor. Taylor of Taylor-and-Corrine. That Taylor. She is a counselor and she was speaking really reflectively about her time on the show and the impact it's had on her professional life. She summed it up as people not necessarily liking her or trusting her because of the way she was portrayed on the show. We know they edit the show within an inch of its life, so it's not that she was a villain; they just needed watchable TV.

The one thing she said that really stuck with me was that she knew she had to give herself a bit of compassion concerning the fact that she did the best she could with what she had.

A paraphrase: Sometimes I regret certain things and thought that, as a counselor, I should've handled everything perfectly. And then I stop and think, No, I did the best I could and I have to trust myself in that. 

And then it was brought up that this is especially important when you're taking the criticism and feedback from others toward yourself.

I've had a rough go of it lately. I've been beating myself up for not being perfect in certain situations. But am I doing the best I can? Usually. I'm not intentionally screwing up or doing my worst. I'm not sabotaging myself. I'm forced to take very real criticism on a very-often basis. It's the nature of things. Again, I AM DOING THE BEST I CAN with what I have and based on what I know.

Sometimes it's necessary to have this reiterated but I didn't exactly expect to come from The Bachelor. I'm guessing it'd just been a really long week and this was certainly a quite necessary ah-ha moment for me.

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