November 7, 2011

Monday Musings: Air Travel

There are two things at which I'm sure I will never be able to succeed.

1.  How to function, smile, or socialize while being outside in the cold.

2.  Air travel.

In fact, as we made our way down the ramp to one of our THREE connecting flights back to Anchorage last week, my husband said, "If I could divorce you before we get on this plane, I would."

My response:  "But your ticket says you have to sit next to me anyway, so what would be the point?"

I would divorce me too if I had to air-travel with me.  In fact, if I could take a pill that would knock me out for 16-24 hours, air travel would be a lot more pleasant.

Let me explain..

I'm claustrophobic.  Horribly.  And I get sick whilst in motion.

So it would make sense that planes make me miserable.

I get hot, and anxious, and all wrought up over the headrest pushing me forward too much.  Actually, I'm that person who leans her seat back from the moment she sits down and never again does it return to the "upright position".

At some point during a longer than 1.5 hour flight, tears may develop due to my frustration with a situation I can do nothing about.  I can't even watch those silly little TVs because the screen is too close to my face.  I get dizzy and nauseous.

And these are the circumstances for a non-turbulent flight.

And I should mention that I also travel in clothes that are comparable to pajamas..with Ugg boots.

Okay that's a lie.  The boots are fake Uggs.  (I'm a schoolteacher after all, people.)

I used to be of the frame of mind that such down-dressers on planes were slobs.  And they are.  If they're flying from Pittsburgh to St. Louis in the summertime (a total of about 75 minutes airtime).

If such a traveler is waking up at 5 am to return an overpriced rental car and sit in an airport for 6 hours, only to ride on THREE separate aircrafts for a total of over 12 hours of airtime...only to the return to the frozen tundra at midnight (really, now, 4am with the time change), she can dress as sloppily as she wishes.

And if such a traveler chooses to curl up on the empty seats with shoes off and coats for a pillow (and a husband for a footrest) on the half full flight to Anchorage?

She can do that too.

So Scott spent 6 total flights tending to my every whim in an effort to stave off what can only be described as a "temper tantrum".

I told him he deserves a medal.

How do YOU feel about air travel?  I see so many people who look like they're enjoying themselves at the airport.  
Are you one of them??  
If you have tips to make my traveling life easier, please share! 

Linking up to Mingle Monday @Life of Meg!

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