June 11, 2015

Why I can easily admit that I'm a mess (S&T 6/11)

Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with me.  Why can't I do all this other stuff other people seem to be so effortless at? Why is it annoying to me to pay a bill on time or make this trip to the DMV or procure a certain document for this or that?  Sometime we might call this "being human".  Or "being an adult".  But truthfully, things always seem so much harder as of late.  I'm stressed out.  Scott isn't here so I'm shouldering all this responsibility and I'm terribly bad at it.  I don't mean to be. I just am. So I started pondering the why...

This is my 4th state in 6 years.  I went from Pennsylvania to Alaska to Missouri to Colorado.





I can't keep the details straight anymore. I have had 6 addresses since May 2009. Not only have I had to learn places, people, regulations, rules, and laws for 4 different states...I've learned how the army works in each different state.  How the bases function, where to go for this or that, etc.  Routines, stores, post offices, banks, and DMVs.  New physicians, dentists, and eye doctors in each state.  Electric companies, garbage companies, cable, internet, etc.  There is plenty of information (most of it useless to me currently) stuffed into my schema.

Now, let's add in my occupation.  I have learned and used the educational standards and objectives for FOUR different states.  I have learned the state history, geography, and government of FOUR different states (Fun fact: Because I keep teaching 4th grade, and Social Studies standards are the same across the country, that means I'm responsible for teaching state history...which means I need to learn the state history of all these states). I have learned the state testing procedures, data tracking systems, and progress monitoring techniques for FOUR different states. The educational legalese of FOUR different states. Keep in mind that each school district does its own thing within each state and I don't even keep track of how many districts or schools I've been in at this point.  I've learned the policies and procedures of one, two, three, and now FOUR different schools on a permanent basis (meaning, not as a substitute).  I've taught diverse groups of students, worked with countless parents, and had fabulous team members and coworkers from one end of this great nation to the other.  However, all that stuff takes up a lot of space.

So, I blame all of the above for why I'm so stressed out.  I just have too much information floating through my train of thought on a daily basis.

And you know, it's okay to be a mess.  It's okay because life is messy and I don't even have all the questions, let alone all the answers.

Stay tuned for next week's thought-provoking piece: "Hey, at least I try to finish things".

Pictures are from Royal Gorge.  Taken by my brother.  




10 comments:

  1. I'm with you. While the information crammed into my head looks a little different, I'm just...overstimulated and inundated with information. Some of it important (which seems lately I'm always forgetting) and some of it completely useless that I can seem to forget. I'm with you, friend. I'm with you. Can we take a vacation?

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  2. Sometimes, it's just too much. And then you're hanging on by a thread and there's nothing to be done about it. LOL And it's okay!

    When does your summer vacation start?

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  3. Oh gosh I can't even imagine! It would be so hard to keep up with all of that!

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  4. You're doing great! I couldn't imagine trying to keep up!

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  5. It's overwhelming trying to keep everything straight! I can definitely understand.

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  6. You have every reason to be overwhelmed and a "mess." I'd say half the battle is realizing it and taking a minute to breathe! -Dorrie @ Bear Den Plantation

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  7. You're doing great, keep it going but I think you need a vacation...just get away and let your brain turn to mush!!

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  8. i can't even imagine!! just moving from one country to another was hard enough, but even at home our states have different laws and stuff but at least we don't have as many states as you! and jeepers learning all that stuff for work - thats a lot of knowledge!

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  9. Moving around a lot gets so overwhelming, I can't even imagine how you feel sometimes. I have lived in a few states, but only two since being an adult. Dealing with DMV and official paperwork is always a hassle, but its a whole new level of panic when you move! Just think about how good you are at history trivia now :)

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  10. Yes. You have every reason to feel messy and overwhelmed because that is a lot crammed into 6 years. But messy is okay. I think most people are a mess. They just hide it better than some of us.

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